Everybody Needs A Mentor
As a little girl I used to dream crazy dreams about all the things that people who grow up to chase “GREATNESS” dream about. I was a misunderstood child and kind of an outcast at school. I faced a lot of bullying. I was shy and timid. I wasn’t the prettiest child either. I got made fun almost every day. I’d go home crying hoping I never have to go back. As I’d go home crying. It was almost as if I created another world for myself. In this world I was popular and everyone admired me as if I was a celebrity figure of some sort although I didn’t really know what that was back then. I just knew how much I wanted to fit in and how much I wanted to belong. I would stand on my bed and give myself speeches as if I was thanking the world for everything I’d finally become. It was a fantasy world that was so surreal at the time. It wasn’t much but it was enough to keep me happy. It was enough to keep me peaceful.
I grew up and I went to highschool. I finally understood what make-up was. I finally understood what being noticed was. I sought out so much validation for myself in the wrong places. This got me into the wrong circles and into the wrong circles of friends. It was the road of bad choices and the paths to failure. I didn’t know who I was. At times I felt like I was pretending to be somebody I wasn’t just to fit in. The bullying didn’t stop. This time I wasn’t being bullied for being an outcast and a loner. This time I was being bullied because I was fearless. On the outside it may have looked that way. On the inside I was just vulnerable and insecure. I couldn’t handle people hating me. I just wanted to please everybody. It was as though I normalized so many things I shouldn’t have normalized as normal just so people would like me.
I eventually found myself in a place where I had to ask myself: How does a intelligent girl end up here? I cried out for help and nobody could hear me. I had so many friends but really I had zero friends. It’s one thing to have a lot of friends. It’s another to have true friends. The friends I had were users. They were people who would just take advantage of me. They weren’t people who saw my potential and uplifted me showing me the person I could be. I surrounded myself by people I would show who they could be and if I ever had a dream. They’d always tell me how I would never succeed at it or how I’m not good enough. The naysayers just sucked me dry. They just sucked the life out of me. I started to listen to them and I started to believe them. They allowed me to believe a lie about myself. I believed it. This is the story for so many of us.
If I was to write my younger self a letter today. I would tell her to stop listening to them. I would tell her you’re an intelligent young girl. You just need a mentor to keep you grounded and on the right track. Over the years I learned how important it is to have one or a few of them. We all need somebody who has been on the road before us to understand us when were about to give up to remind us to keep going because they kept going. We need somebody who can say: “I was there. You’re the younger me. I made it and you will make it too.” We thrive with support but so many times were given distractions and we often give into those distractions. There were times in my life I thought I could do it on my own. I was too proud to accept mentors. Over the years I also learned to drop my pride.
What we put out is what we get back. If what we want is success we gotta find people who are intimidating and successful and listen to them. They made it and what they don’t want is another person coming to use them. We gotta show them that were willing to work as hard as they are. We gotta show them that were willing to earn it. Every successful person craves true friendship and somebody to teach. We need to be teachable. We need to inspire and be inspired. We all have something to learn off of each-other.
In life you need to have people above you who inspire you and force your growth. You need to have people beside you who balance you and help you realize your strengths and how to embrace those more. You need to have people you inspire who motivate you to keep going when you feel like quitting. It’s the cycle of life. It’s the cycle of harmony in success. I’m now an adult who never stops learning. Every day I wake up reading. I may not have understood as a young girl, but I understand now. The principles are simple. The practice of using the principles is where we all fail. One of the keys to healthy success is to find a mentor. Find somebody who encourages you to find yourself. Once you love who you are and once you embrace that person that you love in yourself. Success is not that far off. Finding yourself is living in your passion. Living in your passion means being in enviornments you love being in. In the end you will do anything for your dream once the right things are in place.